sian… do i really have to wait till i fail both my prelims den i start studying?  its not like i am not studying at all lah. but it seems ineffective and inefficient too lei.. damn sian lah.. where is the studying aura.. think i really have to lock up my com le lah. argh…………………………………

maybe i will do so.. if my prelim 1 result is like fuck.. plss frens out there and BUDDHA in heaven, give me strength and will to study. LOL sounds funny but i really hope they could help me. i am someone who cant pull myself tgt..

ok. lets set some goals now…

1) GET RID OF ALL DISTRACTIONS

    - LOCK COM..

    - BE LIKE TING TING, STAY AT HOME STUDY EVERYDAY hahah..

2) REVISE ALL MY NOTES

3) DO ALL MY PAPERS AND TYS WITH UNDERSTANDING AND EASE..

tis are 3 main and basic things i must follow. it will start now….

江蕙--家后

作词：郑进一/陈维祥　作曲：郑进一

有一日咱若老　找无人甲咱友孝　我会陪你
坐惦椅寮　听你讲少年的时阵　你有外摮
吃好吃丑无计较　怨天怨地嘛袂晓　你的手
我会甲你牵条条　因为我是你的家后

阮将青春嫁置恁兜　阮对少年跟你跟甲老
人情世事已经看透透　有啥人比你卡重要
阮的一生献乎恁兜　才知幸福是吵吵闹闹
等待返去的时阵若到　我会让你先走
因为我会呒甘　放你为我目屎流

有一日咱若老　有媳妇子儿友孝　你若无聊
拿咱的相片　看卡早结婚的时阵　你外缘投
穿好穿丑无计较　怪东怪西嘛袂晓
你的心我会永远记条条　因为我是你的家后

阮将青春嫁置恁兜　阮对少年就跟你跟甲老
人情世事嘛已经看透透　有啥人比你卡重要
阮的一生献乎恁兜　才知幸福是吵吵闹闹
等待返去的时阵若到　你着让我先走
因为我会呒甘　看你为我目屎流

a nice and meaningful song. but i think 家后 in hokkien means wife. if u can uds den u will feel the touching sensations frm tis song. hahah..

tml which is about 26 mins to go, is my BEST BROTHER BDAE!!!!!!! haha.. my dear beloved brother who cares alot for me and always there for me. ( although now got ppl snatch frm me.. but i dont mind haha..)

ok.. describe my bro a bit. he’s a guy who cares for me and since young, he always want the best for me. he is handsome ( can fight wif me LOL ><) and he is THE BEST!!!!  I LOVE U!!!!!!!! HAHAHA..

finally i bought a present for my bro.. tis year mus get le.. haha 20 years old liao hor.. haha stay happy ar

老哥 !!爱死你了!!!

ａ　ｂｉｇ　ｐｉｃｔｕｒｅ　ｆｏｒ　ｍｙ　ｂｒｏ！！

i dont noe wat i shld do now.. ???? ?? oR waT???!!! i dont noe. haix.. guess i just have to put tis matter aside first and conc on my studies. and lets wait till the time is ripe K? as --- always says.. 

speaking of which, i have only 1 week to finish all my subjects.. oh crap and tis is not good!!! FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GGED!!! maybe i focus on chem and phy first? den score on it first?? LOL..

holy shit i really dont noe wat to do sia!!! such a failure in self control……… :(

life is unfair. or shld i say ppl are biased. when u have done smth wrong, u may try very hard to make up for it, but do ppl still giv u a chance? be it at work, sch, and even life in matters of relationship with ppl. once u made a mistake, no matter how young you were, how foolish were you, how immature u are at tat time, once u make a mistake, its hard for ppl to TRUST you, give u another chance to really make up for it after years, months, days, hours, minutes, seconds, u tried making up and trying to be a better person. that chance seems to be so hard to be given to you. haix..

now i uds the hardship those ex-convicts faced when they are out. they aren’t accepted anywhere, ppl are biased against them, THEY ARE NOT GIVEN ANOTHER CHANCE EVER AGAIN. this is why most of them become repeaters of offence, since they sees no point in changing. even if they had changed, there seems to be barrier btw them and ppl frm society, even families and friends. so where’s the motivation to change? haix…

all i ask frm u is another chance, but it seems so hard, i dont noe why. but i can definitely say tat i have changed frm the past. jus give me a chance to show u that i am different and of cos, show u that i will not repeat my mistakes ever again. is that so difficult? i do not noe. but one thing i noe is that, if u do not let me show u, how am i supposed to change the views of me in ur heart and mind.

just 1 more chance is all i ask…………

i have once again become a disappointment to my parents. ONCE AGAIN. i have failed in becoming a parents child.

i have failed in becoming the one tat u all wan..

with poor results, poor character, poor “ting hua” ability.

i have failed in everything u all wanna me. maybe u all shouldnt have given birth to me, or shld i say given birth to a born failure.

mayb i shld disappear… although u all will feel sad for a while, but after tat, time will forget everything. at least u all wont face any disappointment anymore..